This post as it relates to the Future of America, is about children. Children are our future, and there are multitudes of children who have suffered and are suffering at this very moment. Somewhere out there right now is a child who is sleeping cold, or hungry. Somewhere out there at right now is a child listening to parents screaming and arguing through the walls. Somewhere out there right now is a child or teenager that is being abused sexually by a relative, friend, or even a neighbor. Somewhere out there is a child who talks to their parent, only to be ignored or brushed off from parents too busy or too stressed out, or too preoccupied with their personal issues to even sign a folder or acknowledge what happened at school. Or on the flip side, a parent may be overly critical, overbearing, controlling and obsessive and have a tendency to smother and intimidate their children. In turn, this creates intense fear and stifles creativity and the opportunity to develop critical thinking. Those are just a few examples, and the list could go on and on. Unfortunately these young impressionable children do not have any intellectual tools to discern right and wrong in an order to protect themselves and blindly accept this abuse- many times feeling guilty or at fault and take on a great deal of shame. This toxic shame becomes maladaptive and leads to many disorders and addictions as a means to cope. There is a good chance if you can identify with any of these scenarios, that you may have experienced some of that growing up. Unfortunately, I have to admit that my own children were affected by abuse, and as their mother, I hope to impart to them my deepest apologies for their needless suffering. This post is for them and it is for you.
Unfortunately, without loving and caring parent's making healthy choices for children, situations and circumstances place children in high risk situations that create environments that are not conducive to learning and growing emotionally, mentally, intellectually, and spiritually. If they live in abuse, they learn how to abuse. If they live neglected, they will not develop as they should and will lag behind their peers on many levels. This gap tends to isolate and alienate these children from the group and they become increasingly frustrated socially and move toward seclusion to avoid rejection. This can lead to more isolation and without having opportunities to practice social situations, leaves them relationally inept and emotionally / intellectually immature. For many of those, they will carry on their parents legacy into the next generation unknowingly and many times continue the needless suffering.
A parents primary responsibility and moral obligation to their children is to impart information so that they can find their way through life, so that they may discover who they are, and what they have to offer the world. So many times children's problems come from a lack of good parenting. As a social worker I see this over and over, and am realizing that I was once like that, and still am sometimes, but I believe I have moved forward, made progress and have gained insight and maturity from being a brave and loving mother. It all begins with being honest with yourself.
For my children- Steven, Kaity and Jojo. I promise to always try to be honest with myself and grow as a mother and friend to you. I am sorry for the things that I did and did not do. Many times I was irresponsible and will not excuse myself as this post is about validating your hurt and pain that my actions caused you. I promise to leave a legacy to you and to do my best til the day I die to give you everything that you need within my power. I love you with all my heart.
If you were abused or neglected and feel sadness, hopelessness and/or a heart filled with pain, I want to tell you how sorry I am for your hardship and loss because of your parent's/caregivers choices. I know that you are hurting and I wish I could hug you, hold you, touch your hair, hold your hand, kiss you, and tell you how special you are. I wish I could be your mother so I could tell you the things that I know you need to hear. I hurt for you too, and wish you love with all my heart.
If you are feeling touched by what I said, and are not a child who lived a painful childhood, but know someone who has, please direct them to this blog. It is my hope that they will find comfort, understanding, honesty, and hope.
The purpose of this post is to help those affected. It is to introduce the basic principals needed to begin the process of healing, so they can find happiness and peace in life.
Some people bring children into this world with intent, purpose and a plan. Then there are those who do so as a result of no planning or an impulse to satisfy some need or selfish desire within themselves. Then- there are others that bring children into the world to simply gain access to services and benefits via a 9-digit free pass that their children are granted from simply being born on our soil. This reward gains them access to housing, food, medical care and cash assistance. Some are the product of unwanted pregnancy due to crimes. No matter the reason though, parents, for the most part, are truly not prepared for the reality of the profound obligation and responsibility of being a parent. Coming into parenting without skill, practice, support, knowledge, awareness, or maturity can really create a recipe for disaster. Many times, these parents are simply ignorant, immature, impulsive, or unaware of important pieces of information. These factors are the keys to becoming successful in many areas of their life- but for the sake of this post- SUCCESSFUL PARENTING.
Children are eager to learn about the world and themselves. They are hungry for information and affirmation and need to know that they are loved and wanted. They are also Enthusiastic about the beautiful and intricate wonders of nature and raw energy that the earth and all species that inhabit it exhibit. This beautiful innocence and wonder is poisoned and crushed in a home of abuse, and/or neglect.
Children of Abuse/Neglect:
I want to talk to you today from my heart. No matter what your story. No matter what has happened. You are here today- right now- reading this blog- moving through time and living in the present. You are here because you were supposed to read this. This is for you.
If you lived in a home, where your caregiver (could be mom, dad, granny, gramps, aunt, uncle, foster parent, etc. ) did not meet your physical, emotional, spiritual, relational, needs and expectations, then you may be suffering from anger, resentment, and bitterness toward them as well as disgust and hatred for your life and the loss of your opportunities as a child. I want to share my experience with you as a mother over my children so that you can begin to understand your parents.
Presently, you might be filled with emotions. Those feelings- if they are negative- can be a barrier to your success in your future. These feelings- which may be strong and negative about yourself, or your family- will prevent you from experiencing true happiness and success. What does that mean to be happy? What does it mean to be successful? Gosh, those might be a tougher questions than you would originally think. This post is to give insight, encourage, and motivate you to move forward. Moving forward may be a slow process. There may be times that your taking two steps forward, and one step back. All growth is this way. Don't lose hope because deep inside you is the ability to take back YOUR life, realize who you are, become aware of your talents, gifts, and skills, but also to honestly appraise weakness at face value and make a plan to bring your life in balance so that you can organize and take action to take back your life that is rightfully yours! Don't allow anyone alive or dead to have the power to control your future. Know that you are the only one in control of your future. It is just a decision to make it happen. At any cost.
The first step to move forward toward your happy successful life is to make an attempt to understand the full picture of your caregiver's situation. This requires a great deal of maturity, as well as creating a mind-set that is focused on being successful ABOVE being a victim.
Letting go of your history as a victim is easier said than done and may take many years to finally make the decision to choose life over death. LIFE = being liberated from a painful past to excel and succeed on your own personal path. DEATH = complaining about what you missed out on, or what your abuser/neglectful caregiver did or did not do to/for you AND MISSING OUT ON OPPORTUNITIES WHILE your looking in the past. Death is also accompanied by pervasive feelings of sadness, hurt, and anger about the injustices that took place.
CAUTION!!!! YOU HAVE BEEN A VICTIM A LONG TIME AND IT IS A HABITUAL AND PERVASIVE MINDSET THAT YOU HAVE CREATED TO SURVIVE. IT WILL NOT BE EASY TO SHAKE AND IS THE BIGGEST CHALLENGE THAT YOU WILL FACE IN MOVING TOWARD SUCCESS.
Before we go further, I feel I need to earn your trust by being very transparent. Maybe you can find a little truth for yourself in some part of our story, and begin to understand where your parents may have been, or perhaps where you fit in in relation to your family and its own unique issues. I think it is important that you know that I am a survivor of a tragic past. I tell you that not for sympathy, but as a transparent point to begin understanding about the cycle of abuse from a generational perspective. I can only hope that you will do as I hope that I have done, and that is to stop the cycle of abuse onto your own family and children. I lost so many opportunities in my life to achieve my dreams and realize my true talents. Because of this ANGER over my loss, I carried many chips on my shoulders for so many years. I am sure that I still have a few. I would cry about my life to anyone who would listen for many, many years. It was the way I survived. I married at 19 for security because I was afraid to be alone. In hindsight, I realize I did not marry for love. I did not know what love is. I did not know any of this at the time, but maturity has helped me to see the truth in that, and for that, I deeply regret hurting my children's father and exposing my children to that life. I had no foresight of where my life was going, nor any cognitive awareness of the consequences of my choices. Living in a violent home kept me from emotionally developing, and as a result paved the way to a careless young adulthood.
I love my children deeply and it was this instinctive love that drove me to find solutions to my problems and to find a better way. I am who I am because of my children. Wanting them to be happy was the motivation for me to find myself and give them a better life. I hated the way that I was hurting them out of ignorance, frustration, and depression. I realize that although I tried my best, in comparison to some of their friends, my trying my best was simply not enough. That expectation from them is normal, and having resentment toward me is understandable. After all, they did not ask to be born, and all children deserve to be brought into this world with love, support and opportunities. But in reality, life is life.
About my children:
First of all, my son Steven, who is 22 years old, supposedly had ADHD. He was a very challenging child to raise- according to MY PERCEPTION at the time. You should know, however I was very young (19). I had very little communication, problem solving, and negotiation skills. I was very immature, and had very little social support.
Steven's desire to please me with little gifts and kisses and entertaining me to "make" me happy made him very susceptible to damaging words and statements that were not intended to be malicious nor hurtful, but out of sheer frustration and ignorance, it did happen. That is reality. All children need to hear good things about them. They need encouragement and need to be taught about life and love. Unfortunately Steven was exposed to temper tantrums, outbursts of frustration and anger born out of my failing as a mother and a wife, and him being neglected due to my depression and mental problems. Steven absorbed all that negative energy. I NOW BELIEVE NOW HE WAS NOT ANY MORE DIFFICULT THAN ANY OTHER CHILD- But that I was a very unskilled parent with many problems, and the task of parenting him by ME was challenging and difficult. He did not deserve that label because of my inablilites. I think that is very important because you may have been told that you were a pain in the ass, and that your parents did everything they could but you, but it was YOU that was difficult. Do not accept that as 100% truth. You may have been difficult, and they may have been troubled, and together the combination was extremely challenging, but remember that you were the child and it was their responsibility to do their best and take care of your needs. If they failed and want to blame you, you cannot change that. All you can do is decide what you want from your life now and take action on making that happen. You cannot be successful in life looking in the rear view mirror and not watching the road. Eventually you will crash from not seeing what is in front of you.
Kaity- My daughter Kaity is 17 and is the sweetest, kindest, and most gentle person I know. She is delicate, precious, and thoughtful. She endured so much of the yelling and screaming and was silent. Her pain was always internalized and her escape was in artistic expression through music, writing, and art. She was always wanting to take care of me and make me feel better when I was upset. She could not be the one taken care of, because there was no one there for her. Her loneliness was always present. She needed someone to be there for her and she never ever asked or demanded a thing. My selfish choices to engage myself in bad relationships left nothing for her, and again, she ended up feeling alone. I was so many times thoughtless and immature and she was always so gracious, loving, and forgiving of me. I am afraid she is going to always give to everyone and always feel empty because she could never expect more from me. She always got the short end of the stick on everything. I hope that I will give her all the love and support she needs from here on out.
Jojo. She is 3. She seems to be doing very well, and I hope to continue to be a good mother to her and give her the information and nurturing that she needs to be happy and successful in her life.
What to do?
Making the decision:
After you realize that being a victim is no longer paying you off the dividends it once did and you choose life, then the healing must begin. Forgiveness only comes through understanding and realizing that it is not for them, but to release you from the power that the pain has in your life. Forgiveness is not something that you have to agree to with the abuser. If they are stubborn and not willing to accept responsibility, then it will only continue to hurt. To move forward is to let go. Its hard to run forward with tons of weight attached to your body. Dump the crap through forgiveness and begin to find people around you that have good character and that encourage you. If you hang out with those who are negative, abusive, irresponsible, and unmotivated- then you will be the same.. Find those people that you admire and make an effort to spend more time with honorable and trustworthy people.
Self discovery:
Now that your not obsessing about the crap, you have more time to think about the world. To think about your dreams. To explore your strengths. Start reading about or researching things that you find interesting and fascinating. Begin to identify where you need to work. If your communication skills are questionable or you feel lost, find a trusted friend or a counselor to give you advice on how to go about figuring out what makes you tick, what motivates you. Start with building your values. What is important to you? Values are the principles that are important to us. They can be anything from self improvement, service, friendship, honesty, integrity, health, career, family, responsibility, financial success, passion, transparency, dignity, altruism (unselfish concern for others). A sincere effort in researching "personal values" will help you do define what is important for you. You need to discover who you are and what you would like to become.
Taking action:
Now is the time to practice your decisions by making choices that reflect your values. It is the time to weed out people you see as an obstacle and invite opportunities to build your new world. Taking time to organize and plan your future with goal-setting. New skills must be learned. Communication and assertiveness are important in the action phase, so if you lack those skills, they must be learned in order to move forward as all success comes through reaching out to others in healthy ways through effective communication.
Follow-up and evaluate progress:
This is essential to see that your on track. Systematic evaluation and self assessment must be followed through with daily, monthly and yearly. Have a trusted friend be a good source of feedback to help your perspective be more objective and quantifiable.
I hope that you enjoyed reading this post. Please feel free to leave a comment or share something that you feel would benefit someone else.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Thursday, November 12, 2009
I chose social work because I am deeply passionate about helping people. In particular, young people who feel helpless about their future. This can be due to possible perceptions of limited opportunities, frustration of not having social support and structure to help them build skills for living in a civilized and solution-focused society, or spending valuable energy coping with meeting basic needs due to living in poverty or abuse.
My life long aspiration (aka pipedream) is to organize a committee of professionals in diverse fields to oversee a longitudinal research study that will develop, and implement a character education curriculum to service the K-12 Public education system in target population areas. I believe that these eventual outcomes of comparative values can be measured from these targeted pilot areas that have the program in place with those of communities with similar economic and ethnic profiles that do not.
I believe analyzing measurable things such as depression, suicide risk, teen pregnancy, drop out rates, college bound statistics, grades, social efficacy, gang activity, and relationship violence will be good indicators of progress to illustrate to Congress the economical advantage of spending money proactively (with education and prevention) versus reactive (in social service spending to deal with the aforementioned problems) It is important to illustrate this for those who make policy, on how this ends up saving tax payer money in the long run.
If we can prove this with careful and methodical results, I believe that, in a collaborative effort, we can modify, or adapt the goals of the Public education system and shape new legislation that will be inclusive of recognizing the need for more support for families in communities.
Young people will learn the values and importance of good citizenship, effective communication, tolerance of diversity and mutual respect for people from all walks of life, especially respect for elders and authority figures.
In addition, by using the already existing school buildings, and developing more readily-accessible family support programs for adults and children- which can range anywhere from parenting classes to budgeting; relationship skill building to self-awareness and self-improvement sessions- that perhaps these professionally led sessions will provide educational and informational opportunities to help empower communities as well as reduce the many aspects of human suffering that occurs in our private homes and within the neighborhoods.
In the K-12 character education program, my hope is that children will have an opportunity to learn valuable social skills, regardless of parents ability or motivation. Our young people will also learn about themselves- they will discover their strengths, gifts and talents in order to pursue their personal goals and dreams in life. Not only will this assist in the development of these children, but provide horizontal support to families, as well as people in the community. In the long run, this will impact each and every American- as we are all affected by a system that is broken.
This great nation, can become even greater if we embrace the need to address humanitarian issues as we do economic ones. I believe with a more educated population- making better choices; we can do even greater things.
So much money is spent managing and delivering social programs and services. Unfortunately, these programs are perceived by many to simply sweep societal ills under the rug by giving handouts. Without accountability of recipients making forward progress- within a reasonable and effective system, Americans tire of dealing with the cycle of poverty and feel helpless and robbed because they do not feel their money is being spent productively.
Out of frustration, there is a tendency to blame recipients for taking advantage and exploiting the system.
Rather than asking the question, "Is the delivery and structure of the current system really reasonable and streamlined to provide the best delivery for people?"
" Is it really getting to the bottom of the problem and working directly and deliberately to address the issues that create these unfortunate circumstances to begin with?"
The intention of teaching people how to "fish for themselves", does not come in providing a quick job or brief resolution counseling, but in careful investment of our children and their families and neighbors within programs that work to really build people up to feel a sense of purpose, meaning and personal responsibility to themselves, their families as well as their communities.
I believe that when there are creative solutions, and a transparent intention to empower and instill pride and ownership in our people (within reasonable expectations and guidelines,) that true progress from our monies allocated for social services can be realized.
In the heart of all Americans- Republicans, Democrats, and Independents with common sense and a true concern for Humanity want to know that money is being spent wisely and that people are going to be in a better place eventually so that recipients can take responsibility for themselves.
Of course, in reality there are always going to be those who abuse the system- as with all things in every aspect of life. I am not aiming to change that behavior because wasting energy trying to control a few of the bad apples only takes away from those, who like me, will utilize and capitalize on opportunities that are beneficial for the long run. We can only hope that in the long run, those that do abuse and exploit the system, will come to trust a system that truly wants everyone to have an equal opportunity, and in turn- do the right thing.
An analogy that I made up- since I am 41- and just now getting around to graduating is:
It takes some people longer to reach their destination, especially if they did not have a car.
The analogy is that the "car" is basically a person's net resources that they are born into, ie. skilled and healthy parents, financial security, capitalized growth opportunities as a young adolescent from educators, advisors, faith organizations, etc.. If those things were not available or perhaps even non-existent; a person might just be inclined to accept this as reality and just exist day-to-day.
I believe that most people if given information, and provided choices that eradicate helplessness - would begin to realize their potential, strengths, talents, and gifts/skills, and make a cognizant and deliberate decision to let go of a painful past or a life of limited exposure to valuable resources. That they will choose to brush the chips off their shoulders, and take full responsibility for their success and happiness regardless of their "lot in life," and eventually- hopefully- end up where I am, that being successful in their pursuit of realizing those hopes and dreams and in reality, moving toward happiness and making progress by not allowing anyone (alive or dead)- or any circumstance- the power to strip away their potential or possibilities of all that life has to offer.
I look in the mirror everyday and tell myself, "you are not giving up today, that is not an option. No matter how tired you feel, God has made provisions for you to sustain this situation, and know that 7 months from now, when you walk across that stage, It will be an unbelievable feeling that you will carry with you until the day you die."
My life long aspiration (aka pipedream) is to organize a committee of professionals in diverse fields to oversee a longitudinal research study that will develop, and implement a character education curriculum to service the K-12 Public education system in target population areas. I believe that these eventual outcomes of comparative values can be measured from these targeted pilot areas that have the program in place with those of communities with similar economic and ethnic profiles that do not.
I believe analyzing measurable things such as depression, suicide risk, teen pregnancy, drop out rates, college bound statistics, grades, social efficacy, gang activity, and relationship violence will be good indicators of progress to illustrate to Congress the economical advantage of spending money proactively (with education and prevention) versus reactive (in social service spending to deal with the aforementioned problems) It is important to illustrate this for those who make policy, on how this ends up saving tax payer money in the long run.
If we can prove this with careful and methodical results, I believe that, in a collaborative effort, we can modify, or adapt the goals of the Public education system and shape new legislation that will be inclusive of recognizing the need for more support for families in communities.
Young people will learn the values and importance of good citizenship, effective communication, tolerance of diversity and mutual respect for people from all walks of life, especially respect for elders and authority figures.
In addition, by using the already existing school buildings, and developing more readily-accessible family support programs for adults and children- which can range anywhere from parenting classes to budgeting; relationship skill building to self-awareness and self-improvement sessions- that perhaps these professionally led sessions will provide educational and informational opportunities to help empower communities as well as reduce the many aspects of human suffering that occurs in our private homes and within the neighborhoods.
In the K-12 character education program, my hope is that children will have an opportunity to learn valuable social skills, regardless of parents ability or motivation. Our young people will also learn about themselves- they will discover their strengths, gifts and talents in order to pursue their personal goals and dreams in life. Not only will this assist in the development of these children, but provide horizontal support to families, as well as people in the community. In the long run, this will impact each and every American- as we are all affected by a system that is broken.
This great nation, can become even greater if we embrace the need to address humanitarian issues as we do economic ones. I believe with a more educated population- making better choices; we can do even greater things.
So much money is spent managing and delivering social programs and services. Unfortunately, these programs are perceived by many to simply sweep societal ills under the rug by giving handouts. Without accountability of recipients making forward progress- within a reasonable and effective system, Americans tire of dealing with the cycle of poverty and feel helpless and robbed because they do not feel their money is being spent productively.
Out of frustration, there is a tendency to blame recipients for taking advantage and exploiting the system.
Rather than asking the question, "Is the delivery and structure of the current system really reasonable and streamlined to provide the best delivery for people?"
" Is it really getting to the bottom of the problem and working directly and deliberately to address the issues that create these unfortunate circumstances to begin with?"
The intention of teaching people how to "fish for themselves", does not come in providing a quick job or brief resolution counseling, but in careful investment of our children and their families and neighbors within programs that work to really build people up to feel a sense of purpose, meaning and personal responsibility to themselves, their families as well as their communities.
I believe that when there are creative solutions, and a transparent intention to empower and instill pride and ownership in our people (within reasonable expectations and guidelines,) that true progress from our monies allocated for social services can be realized.
In the heart of all Americans- Republicans, Democrats, and Independents with common sense and a true concern for Humanity want to know that money is being spent wisely and that people are going to be in a better place eventually so that recipients can take responsibility for themselves.
Of course, in reality there are always going to be those who abuse the system- as with all things in every aspect of life. I am not aiming to change that behavior because wasting energy trying to control a few of the bad apples only takes away from those, who like me, will utilize and capitalize on opportunities that are beneficial for the long run. We can only hope that in the long run, those that do abuse and exploit the system, will come to trust a system that truly wants everyone to have an equal opportunity, and in turn- do the right thing.
An analogy that I made up- since I am 41- and just now getting around to graduating is:
It takes some people longer to reach their destination, especially if they did not have a car.
The analogy is that the "car" is basically a person's net resources that they are born into, ie. skilled and healthy parents, financial security, capitalized growth opportunities as a young adolescent from educators, advisors, faith organizations, etc.. If those things were not available or perhaps even non-existent; a person might just be inclined to accept this as reality and just exist day-to-day.
I believe that most people if given information, and provided choices that eradicate helplessness - would begin to realize their potential, strengths, talents, and gifts/skills, and make a cognizant and deliberate decision to let go of a painful past or a life of limited exposure to valuable resources. That they will choose to brush the chips off their shoulders, and take full responsibility for their success and happiness regardless of their "lot in life," and eventually- hopefully- end up where I am, that being successful in their pursuit of realizing those hopes and dreams and in reality, moving toward happiness and making progress by not allowing anyone (alive or dead)- or any circumstance- the power to strip away their potential or possibilities of all that life has to offer.
I look in the mirror everyday and tell myself, "you are not giving up today, that is not an option. No matter how tired you feel, God has made provisions for you to sustain this situation, and know that 7 months from now, when you walk across that stage, It will be an unbelievable feeling that you will carry with you until the day you die."
Sunday, September 13, 2009
I went to the Fort Worth Star-telegram to read Mr. McCullough's apology, however it was at that time, I was made aware, that the prompting of his apology came not from the burden he created on the students to actually VIEW the address, but of the backlash he was receiving from citizens regarding his decision to authorize a half-day's pass to 5th graders to go the Dallas Cowboy's Stadium to hear a George W. Bush lecture. This added insult to injury.
Based on new this information, and since he acted alone in this decision according to the district, he did an enormous disservice to our students in his sole decision to allow a 30 minute pass for students to leave the campus to VIEW the address OFF CAMPUS provided they bring a signed permission slip with them. This was very disturbing to me first and foremost to place the burden on those who wished to view it, instead of placing the burden on those whose parents were in opposition and did not wish their children to view it. There is something very amiss with that in and of itself fundamentally speaking. Mr. McCullough did not convene with the Board of Trustees or the Principles. He placed himself in a very precarious position in that his actions could be misconstrued as personal political bias on his part, which in that case, compromises the integrity of his position as superintendent. Without the accountability afforded in a group decision, it is possible that he did not separate his own personal feelings politically from his position, which, if that is the case, brings up ethical concerns. Of course, discovery of Mr. McCullough's intent must be the next step from those who have to power to make a decision regarding his remaining as Superintendent. I hope that the governing body that has the authorization to do so, takes the appropriate steps to move forward transparently in that discovery and upon deliberation, will make a decision, and communicate that decision to the community. I believe that this action, will quell the hearts of people like me who entrust their children's education to this district. I believe that will begin the process of healing for those that have been hurt by his choices. As I had stated in previously, McCullough's decision:
If the Arlington district truly wants to build healthy, productive, mindful, responsible, law-abiding citizens that value personal responsibility and above all, have high regard for our leaders from parents, teachers, local governing bodies, all the way up to the President, we must set the bar at the top. We must demand and uphold the superintendent to be mindful of his position for the children that he is to be looking out for and hold him accountable to the decisions that he makes. Especially those decisions that he acts upon alone. These are fundamental principles that must not waiver. These children are watching our every move, thinking for themselves and forming opinions of what they see. We must be mindful of that. They will act accordingly. I would like this district to uphold what is best for the children first and foremost, and will act upon what is right for them. I would like to see this district send a clear message to the kids and the community- that this situation will be addressed appropriately. I would like this district to serve as a model to our children, faculty, and community that all choices, good or bad, have consequences. I would like this district to find a way to resolve this issue swiftly and carefully so that this our children can get back to the business of learning. I would like this district to find a creative way to make this situation, an opportunity to them to learn. Let's give these children the credit that they deserve, and show them respect by validating them through open involvement and clear communication. It is what we do in adversity, that our character shines through. To sweep this under the rug, with a pat on the hand is not enough, and that too, sends a clear message to the students, parents, faculty, community, and the nation. Because of the national attention that we have received as a district, our response will show everyone what we are truly made of. We must be mindful of that as well, for they will act accordingly. |
Friday, September 11, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Hello. My last two posts were my reactions to the observations of behavior of individuals that I feel behaved irresponsibly. These two politicians that I made reference to have led me to become quite passionate about speaking my mind as well as creating new ideas to develop solutions to help the president. The president had three main points on his political campaign.
1. Renewable energy to be more environmentally friendly.
2. Affordable Healthcare for all.
3. Education for each person in this country to realize their talents and skills and put their best foot forward to make a contribution to themselves as well as their country.
Now, I try to keep it real, and everyone can see that we have many other issues going on besides the three that are presented here. But, I believe that the President addressing his primary campaign issues are guided by the basic principles of personal responsiblity and justice for all. Last night, the president ended his speech about the character of this country. Our moral obligation to humanity. Granted, the economy is not stable, and measures have been taken to assemble some return to that financial security, but I believe that the reasons that we came to that point of financial devastation has been born out of core problems that come from inhumane practices by big business and a desire to obtain the highest profits without regard to human cost. Focusing on profit margins instead of people have led us down that road.
The president, at least from my point of view is trying to reach into the hearts and passions of every American (young and old) to bring us back to a place that involves matters of the heart. Compassion and concern for the earth, other humans, as well as our future (children) are what he is attempintg to revitalize.
The demands for accountability from all walks of life, all sectors, young and old, big business, parents, educators, children, and legislators that will help to shape the new policies based on principles of the fundamentals of character and integrity. Those include doing the right thing for people, regardless of color or socioeconomic status, or level of education.
In a diverse society, with people practicing different religions, we must work together through one common thread. This common thread is humanity. A concern for the welfare of ourselves and for others. All businesses that have sustained successful profits and have been responsible in regards to human well-being make provisions for its employees including providing health care as well as opportunities for continuing education, and taking adequate paid time off to be with families and friends and provide some framework for the balance of work/rest/play.
Exploiting people by reducing benefits, cutting back on vacation time, not providing educational opportunities for personal growth through ongoing job training or credits for college, and a bottom line approach has led us down the road of not seeing people any more at all. Something is lost when you do that-our hearts for the welfare and well being of humanity as a whole.
The time has come to demand that all employers, to some extent be held accountable to its employees in terms of providing those provisions. Many times, the employers approach is to have the highest profits, and provide the least amount of provisions as allowed by law. Employers need to take into consideration other needs of employees. Employers need to be held accountable to do the right thing. Character and obligation to doing what is right for humanity should be the guiding principle behind decisions that affect people in regards to healthcare and other benefits that are essential. An example might be if your profiting 10%, maybe its time to reinvest the 5% percent back into your empolyees, and keep the remaining for themselves. Giving to organizations for tax incentives is not the kind of reinvestment that I am talking about and should not be a substitute for doing the right thing for employees. A healthcare option keeps employers accountable and gives people a sense of security. It puts pressure on the people who have the power to exploit, to do the right thing, or deal with a consequence. We cannot blindly accept that all businesses are going to do the right thing. The temptation to earn the largest profit is too strong and needs to be in check.
Now you may be saying that those are different issues all together and that one does not intertwine with the other, but I disagree. Employees are people. Not robots. People have needs to be healthy emotionally and physically. It is the human condition. We have a need to take care of ourselves on basic levels-shelter, food, and clothing. We also need to be healthy, and preserve our health through preventative efforts. People going to emergency rooms for cuts and scrapes and infections are not what emergency services are there for. If a person does not seek medical attention by going to the doctor early on, it is much more expensive to be reactive to an illness or disease that has progressed to an emergency level. To pay employees just enough to make ends meet is not enough. People need additional benefits that make life worth living. Money to put their kids in dance, or money to go on a trip. Money to pay for tuition to improve themselves. To just meet the status quo, without providing for people's health, happiness, and security is a recipe for disaster. Look at the way things are NOW. A solution must be made or these problems will continue to spiral out of control. Please show support to President Obama's healthcare reform so that legislators can work to compromise and negotiate to put this new policy into action.
http://my.barackobama.com/page/content/hcsignon/?returnlink=false
On a side note, addressing the Presidents Address to the nation's children I wanted to comment on this. Upon research, I found a youtube link regarding the letter that was written by the President to his daughters about what has driven him in his life, as well as the reasons that he decided to become the president. This letter I believe, written to his children comes from the heart. I do not believe in any way that this letter was written for political gain. The reason, I believe it was shared with the country was intended to communicate who President Obama is as a father and a person. For those children without fathers who care, it could have been written to them as well.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8NEAMm95qC4
It was a video showing other children reading his inspirational words. This president has set out to deal with our country on the brink of financial disaster. He has also set out to deal with the fundamental problems associated with character surrounding doing the right thing for people. If you can, put all of your biases aside and just listen to him at face value. This will be the biggest challenge to those who are in opposition of him. The equation is simple. When two people/parties disagree on a topic, the only way to coming to a solution that is good for both parties is a decision/effort to genuinely work together to negotiate and compromise through respectful and healthy dialogue.
The President of the UNITED states of America, Barack Obama, was initially asking for children to write a letter to themselves on how they were going to contribute their talents and skills and dreams to make the country a better place. The accusations of indoctrination of political cult-like Marxism from right winged opposition was a sad barrier and the children did not get to hear him ask them to do that. As a matter of fact, my teenage daughter who attends a public school here in the state of TEXAS did not get to see that at the school because of parents creating such a disturbing outcry. I sat down with my child and we watched it after school because I believe in the Presidents cause. As a student, I asked myself that same question at 41 years of age. What can I do to help this president? I have been doing a lot of thinking and realize that I want to take action now. Not later.
Right now, in an effort to help the president to his cause, I have created a dream. It is to form a committee of professionals and non-professionals to innovate, develop and implement a life-skills program for the US Public Education system for grades K-12. I believe so strongly that education is the key to our social ills in all areas of life. Rather than having reactive policies that deal with poverty, oppression, and disadvantaged populations that struggle, I believe a more proactive approach to empower those people would help save time, money, and lives. My dream is to be apart of the process of innovating, developing and implementing this essential life-skills program for children early on in the education system to help them to develop emotionally, intellectually, rationally, and driven to become productive and responsible citizens of the United States of America. Not only is this the job of parents, it is the job of all educators.
1. Renewable energy to be more environmentally friendly.
2. Affordable Healthcare for all.
3. Education for each person in this country to realize their talents and skills and put their best foot forward to make a contribution to themselves as well as their country.
Now, I try to keep it real, and everyone can see that we have many other issues going on besides the three that are presented here. But, I believe that the President addressing his primary campaign issues are guided by the basic principles of personal responsiblity and justice for all. Last night, the president ended his speech about the character of this country. Our moral obligation to humanity. Granted, the economy is not stable, and measures have been taken to assemble some return to that financial security, but I believe that the reasons that we came to that point of financial devastation has been born out of core problems that come from inhumane practices by big business and a desire to obtain the highest profits without regard to human cost. Focusing on profit margins instead of people have led us down that road.
The president, at least from my point of view is trying to reach into the hearts and passions of every American (young and old) to bring us back to a place that involves matters of the heart. Compassion and concern for the earth, other humans, as well as our future (children) are what he is attempintg to revitalize.
The demands for accountability from all walks of life, all sectors, young and old, big business, parents, educators, children, and legislators that will help to shape the new policies based on principles of the fundamentals of character and integrity. Those include doing the right thing for people, regardless of color or socioeconomic status, or level of education.
In a diverse society, with people practicing different religions, we must work together through one common thread. This common thread is humanity. A concern for the welfare of ourselves and for others. All businesses that have sustained successful profits and have been responsible in regards to human well-being make provisions for its employees including providing health care as well as opportunities for continuing education, and taking adequate paid time off to be with families and friends and provide some framework for the balance of work/rest/play.
Exploiting people by reducing benefits, cutting back on vacation time, not providing educational opportunities for personal growth through ongoing job training or credits for college, and a bottom line approach has led us down the road of not seeing people any more at all. Something is lost when you do that-our hearts for the welfare and well being of humanity as a whole.
The time has come to demand that all employers, to some extent be held accountable to its employees in terms of providing those provisions. Many times, the employers approach is to have the highest profits, and provide the least amount of provisions as allowed by law. Employers need to take into consideration other needs of employees. Employers need to be held accountable to do the right thing. Character and obligation to doing what is right for humanity should be the guiding principle behind decisions that affect people in regards to healthcare and other benefits that are essential. An example might be if your profiting 10%, maybe its time to reinvest the 5% percent back into your empolyees, and keep the remaining for themselves. Giving to organizations for tax incentives is not the kind of reinvestment that I am talking about and should not be a substitute for doing the right thing for employees. A healthcare option keeps employers accountable and gives people a sense of security. It puts pressure on the people who have the power to exploit, to do the right thing, or deal with a consequence. We cannot blindly accept that all businesses are going to do the right thing. The temptation to earn the largest profit is too strong and needs to be in check.
Now you may be saying that those are different issues all together and that one does not intertwine with the other, but I disagree. Employees are people. Not robots. People have needs to be healthy emotionally and physically. It is the human condition. We have a need to take care of ourselves on basic levels-shelter, food, and clothing. We also need to be healthy, and preserve our health through preventative efforts. People going to emergency rooms for cuts and scrapes and infections are not what emergency services are there for. If a person does not seek medical attention by going to the doctor early on, it is much more expensive to be reactive to an illness or disease that has progressed to an emergency level. To pay employees just enough to make ends meet is not enough. People need additional benefits that make life worth living. Money to put their kids in dance, or money to go on a trip. Money to pay for tuition to improve themselves. To just meet the status quo, without providing for people's health, happiness, and security is a recipe for disaster. Look at the way things are NOW. A solution must be made or these problems will continue to spiral out of control. Please show support to President Obama's healthcare reform so that legislators can work to compromise and negotiate to put this new policy into action.
http://my.barackobama.com/page/content/hcsignon/?returnlink=false
On a side note, addressing the Presidents Address to the nation's children I wanted to comment on this. Upon research, I found a youtube link regarding the letter that was written by the President to his daughters about what has driven him in his life, as well as the reasons that he decided to become the president. This letter I believe, written to his children comes from the heart. I do not believe in any way that this letter was written for political gain. The reason, I believe it was shared with the country was intended to communicate who President Obama is as a father and a person. For those children without fathers who care, it could have been written to them as well.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8NEAMm95qC4
It was a video showing other children reading his inspirational words. This president has set out to deal with our country on the brink of financial disaster. He has also set out to deal with the fundamental problems associated with character surrounding doing the right thing for people. If you can, put all of your biases aside and just listen to him at face value. This will be the biggest challenge to those who are in opposition of him. The equation is simple. When two people/parties disagree on a topic, the only way to coming to a solution that is good for both parties is a decision/effort to genuinely work together to negotiate and compromise through respectful and healthy dialogue.
The President of the UNITED states of America, Barack Obama, was initially asking for children to write a letter to themselves on how they were going to contribute their talents and skills and dreams to make the country a better place. The accusations of indoctrination of political cult-like Marxism from right winged opposition was a sad barrier and the children did not get to hear him ask them to do that. As a matter of fact, my teenage daughter who attends a public school here in the state of TEXAS did not get to see that at the school because of parents creating such a disturbing outcry. I sat down with my child and we watched it after school because I believe in the Presidents cause. As a student, I asked myself that same question at 41 years of age. What can I do to help this president? I have been doing a lot of thinking and realize that I want to take action now. Not later.
Right now, in an effort to help the president to his cause, I have created a dream. It is to form a committee of professionals and non-professionals to innovate, develop and implement a life-skills program for the US Public Education system for grades K-12. I believe so strongly that education is the key to our social ills in all areas of life. Rather than having reactive policies that deal with poverty, oppression, and disadvantaged populations that struggle, I believe a more proactive approach to empower those people would help save time, money, and lives. My dream is to be apart of the process of innovating, developing and implementing this essential life-skills program for children early on in the education system to help them to develop emotionally, intellectually, rationally, and driven to become productive and responsible citizens of the United States of America. Not only is this the job of parents, it is the job of all educators.
I watched the president address the nation regarding health care last night. Some of the things he said were simply wonderful. I also watched the address to the nations children on you tube. Once again, it was a wonderful thing to hear. I am simply baffled with the reactions of people. It was a shame to see the behavior of uncivilized educated people last night. It is a shame to watch the media (FOX news) convey to the general public messages that are not factual and definitely biased. These public officials are role models and for the country to witness such demonstrative behavior indicative of ignorance is a dangerous situation indeed. The president has always been an inspiration to me. His speech last night along with the speech to America's children were wonderful. Unfortunately, that emotional turmoil based out of fear blinds people. It is too bad that their behavior is an example of the American public, and is being viewed by the entire world. They are also role models for our children. In the end, President Obama will win the respect and trust a skeptical general public. This will take time, and we must endure and encourage others to think critically and not give up on ourselves as a unified country. Here is a link to support the president. Please pass it along to all that you know and post it on your Facebook page if you wish. We must begin to show president Obama our support.
http://my.barackobama.com/page/content/hcsignon/?returnlink=false
http://my.barackobama.com/
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Health Care Reform
I am very concerned. Not of the Health care reform being proposed. But of the reactions of the citizens of this country. What is going on with people behaving irrationally; concerned and afraid citizens suffering from knee-jerk reactions making moralistic, judgmental, ignorant comments toward lawmakers; and high powered weapons being brought to public forums intended to share information regarding the health care proposals?
Also, what's up with high profile individuals making wild claims about death panels inciting confusion and fear? Where are the responsibilities of these supposedly educated individuals? Do they not realize the fuel that is being added to the already difficult task of reforming health care? From my point of view, these past few weeks have reminded me of the Ringling Brothers Performance that I took my 3-year-old to last week.
These are just a few observations that have me wondering about the future of America.
I am just an everyday person asking, What ever happened to critical thinking?
Has anyone stopped to consider what the outside world sees of our nation?
I realize that fear breeds irrational thinking and that leads to behaviors like these, but we must all try to stay calm and look critically at what is really going on. Not on what is being said by people who may be reacting without being fully informed.
It is our responsibility to take the time to read and research what is really being presented in the health care proposals instead of blindly jumping on the fear bandwagon. I feel that we should all be mindful of how our behavior is perceived by one another in this country, as well in the global context. I would like to think that collectively we are intelligent, rational, and reasonable individuals that base our opinions on facts presented.
Please take the time to view these links:
http://www.whitehouse.gov/issues/health_care/
http://www.healthreform.gov/
http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/show (as of today only 370,000 people have viewed it.)
And finally the link of all 1036 pages.
http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text
I think this is a good place to just get started so that you can form your own opinion. You can also click if you support the bill or oppose it. Your vote does matter and it is important that you assert yourself this way. Being informed also gives you credibility when you are making an argument regarding your position.
Also, what's up with high profile individuals making wild claims about death panels inciting confusion and fear? Where are the responsibilities of these supposedly educated individuals? Do they not realize the fuel that is being added to the already difficult task of reforming health care? From my point of view, these past few weeks have reminded me of the Ringling Brothers Performance that I took my 3-year-old to last week.
These are just a few observations that have me wondering about the future of America.
I am just an everyday person asking, What ever happened to critical thinking?
Has anyone stopped to consider what the outside world sees of our nation?
I realize that fear breeds irrational thinking and that leads to behaviors like these, but we must all try to stay calm and look critically at what is really going on. Not on what is being said by people who may be reacting without being fully informed.
It is our responsibility to take the time to read and research what is really being presented in the health care proposals instead of blindly jumping on the fear bandwagon. I feel that we should all be mindful of how our behavior is perceived by one another in this country, as well in the global context. I would like to think that collectively we are intelligent, rational, and reasonable individuals that base our opinions on facts presented.
Please take the time to view these links:
http://www.whitehouse.gov/issues/health_care/
http://www.healthreform.gov/
http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/show (as of today only 370,000 people have viewed it.)
And finally the link of all 1036 pages.
http://www.opencongress.org/bill/111-h3200/text
I think this is a good place to just get started so that you can form your own opinion. You can also click if you support the bill or oppose it. Your vote does matter and it is important that you assert yourself this way. Being informed also gives you credibility when you are making an argument regarding your position.
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